I Hate My Life And That's Okay...I Think?!?!

I love the book of Ecclesiastes.  It is such a heart searching, practical, REAL way that Solomon looks at our days on the Earth; especially in the 2^nd chapter.  I so understand his pain and worry.  I have felt like this many a time in my walk with Adonai.

Granted, I could never afford to live like Solomon did nor was I granted the wisdom he was or at least I am not aware of it to date.  But I get how a heavenly mindset can make this world’s toils look foolish and pointless.  As if you are free and yet imprisoned by this life.  It is a life replete with the mundane and repeating.  As he says in chapter 1, there is nothing new under the sun.

Ecclesiastes 2

1 I said to myself, “Come now, I will test myself with pleasure and enjoying good things”; but this too was pointless.

2 Of laughter I said, “This is stupid,” and of pleasure, “What’s the use of it?”

3 I searched my mind for how to gratify my body with wine and, with my mind still guiding me with wisdom, how to pursue foolishness; my object was to find out what was the best thing for people to do during the short time they have under heaven to live.

4 I worked on a grand scale — I built myself palaces, planted myself vineyards, 5 and made myself gardens and parks; in them I planted all kinds of fruit trees. 6 I made myself pools from which to water the trees springing up in the forest. 7 I bought male and female slaves, and I had my home-born slaves as well. I also had growing herds of cattle and flocks of sheep, more than anyone before me in Yerushalayim.

8 I amassed silver and gold, the wealth of kings and provinces. I acquired male and female singers, things that provide sensual delight, and a good many concubines. 9 So I grew great, surpassing all who preceded me in Yerushalayim; my wisdom, too, stayed with me.

10 I denied my eyes nothing they wanted. I withheld no pleasure from myself; for I took pleasure in all my work, and this was my reward for all my work.

11 Then I looked at all that my hands had accomplished and at the work I had toiled at; and I saw that it was all meaningless and feeding on wind, and that there was nothing to be gained under the sun.

12 So I decided to look more carefully at wisdom, stupidity and foolishness; for what can the man who succeeds the king do, except what has already been done? 13 I saw that wisdom is more useful than foolishness, just as light is more useful than darkness.

14 

The wise man has eyes in his head,
but the fool walks in darkness.
Yet the same fate awaits them all.

15 So I said to myself, “If the same thing happens to the fool as to me, then what did I gain by being wise?” and I thought to myself, “This too is pointless. 16 For the wise man, like the fool, will not be long remembered, inasmuch as in the times to come, everything will long ago have been forgotten. The wise man, no less than the fool, must die.”

17 So I came to hate life, because the activities done under the sun were loathesome to me, since everything is meaningless and feeding on wind.

18 I hated all the things for which I had worked under the sun, because I saw that I would have to leave them to the man who will come after me.

19 Who knows whether he will be a wise man or a fool? Yet he will have control over all the things I worked for and which demonstrated how wise I am under the sun. This too is pointless.

20 Thus I came to despair over all the things I had worked for under the sun. 21 Here is a man whose work is done with wisdom, knowledge and skill; yet he has to leave it to someone who has put no work into it. This is not only pointless, but a great evil.

22 For what does a person get from all his efforts and ambitions permeating the work he does under the sun?

23 His whole life is one of pain, and his work is full of stress; even at night his mind gets no rest. This too is pointless.

24 So there is nothing better for a man to do than eat, drink and and let himself enjoy the good that results from his work. I also realized that this is from God’s hand.

25 For who will eat and who will enjoy except me?

26 For to the man who is good from [God’s] viewpoint he gives wisdom, knowledge and joy; but to the sinner he gives the task of collecting and accumulating things to leave to him who is good from God’s viewpoint. This too is pointless and feeding on wind.

Now where I depart from Solomon is about verse 18.  I have no worries about those that come after me for tomorrow has enough to worry about.  I am like verse 17 because I have to toil instead of commune and steward the things of Elohim (think going back to the garden).  I have to run in the rat wheel for cheese that someone else already owns and needs to pay somebody else.  Not that all the money in the world would suffice; it won’t (Hebrews 13:5).

Contentment is not found in this life and the things we do here.  It will only be found in the next life when our hearts are filled with that which can satisfy our desires eternally.  I know that sounds ethereal and not something easily grasped, but that is the best I have to describe it.  Other descriptions sound clichéd and cheesy and frankly just give us false expectations that lead to false paths we walk on.

Never think that having a bunch of money or stuff will ever satisfy.  It won’t and just like all things in this visible world, it will let you down.  We were never meant to stay here or this be our end satisfaction.  It is okay to not be satisfied with this life (John 12:24-26).  This life is a means to the end: Yeshua our Messiah.

Being the Cheerful Receiver

2 Corinthians 9:6-8

6 Now this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.

7 Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed;

He who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.  When a farmer plants a field, if he is sparing with the seed, he will yield a small crop or none at all, but most farmers overseed knowing that not all of the seed will be fruitful.  I grew up in a culture where you argued over the check and everyone tended to himself or herself and if they made more in life, it was because they worked harder…rubbish I say.

When someone gives to others they must give what they have purposed in their heart.  And those on the receiving end need to receive it with cheer.  This will do two things: 1) Allow joy to flow to the cheerful giver or 2) Reveal the true nature of a person’s heart and cause them to face it.  I must admit that I used to fall into the trap of not letting others care for me.  It was chivalrous or whatever they call it.  You’re not a man unless you take care of your end of it.  Pure nonsense. 

If you want to see what a real man is then read the Scriptures.  He looks quite different than an American man.

Acts 20:33-35

33 “I have not wanted for myself anyone’s silver or gold or clothing.

34 You yourselves know that these hands of mine have provided not only for my own needs, but for the needs of my co-workers as well.

35 In everything I have given you an example of how, by working hard like this, you must help the weak, remembering the words of the Lord Yeshua himself, ‘There is more happiness in giving than in receiving.’”

Paul says that he provided not only for his own needs but to the needs of his co-workers as well.  We are supposed to work so that we may provide for our families as well as our brothers and sisters in Yeshua.  It is “happiness” to those who give to the weak (those in hard financial times).

Deuteronomy 26:10-13

10 Therefore, as you see, I have now brought the firstfruits of the land which you, Adonai, have given me.’ You are then to put the basket down before Adonai your God, prostrate yourself before Adonai your God,

11 and take joy in all the good that Adonai your God has given you, your household, the Levi and the foreigner living with you.

12 “After you have separated a tenth of the crops yielded in the third year, the year of separating a tenth, and have given it to the Levi, the foreigner, the orphan and the widow, so that they can have enough food to satisfy them while staying with you; 13 you are to say, in the presence of Adonai your God, ‘I have rid my house of the things set aside for God and given them to the Levi, the foreigner, the orphan and the widow, in keeping with every one of the mitzvot you gave me. I haven’t disobeyed any of your mitzvot or forgotten them.

We are even commanded to use our tithe for the foreigner, orphan, and the widow.  Next time you go to tithe ask yourself the question: Do I know someone in need who could use this tithe?  If you do, give it to them.  That is the biblical way of tithing.  Not giving it to a congregation and absolving yourself of your responsibility to take care of those in need.

Be cheerful when giving and receiving.  Be a part of the blessing, not a hindrance.  Know that when someone gives you something they have purposed to do it in their heart.  If they have done it half-heartedly, Adonai will deal with them.  Your part is to receive because nothing happens by chance in life.  Elohim is in complete control and that moment was meant to be.

Shalom!